Eventually

Isn't that the dream?

That one day, you'll stop for a moment.  Maybe you'll just relax your shoulders and smile or maybe you'll burst into tears, but in that instant, you realize you really are happy.   The work you've put in, the pains you've suffered, and the times you felt like nothing was worth it anymore would all be explained.  It would all be worth it because with all that has happened, you're happy now.  The past can't haunt you, and the future can't be daunting because you've got it.  You're happy.


Doesn't that explain everything we ever do?

All of the vying for money, the intense soul-searching, the desperation for others' approval, the "progress".
We're saving up and building up and storing up so that one day we can have that moment.
We can be truly happy.



And it's no good to consider the possibility that the moment won't come.  It's better to live in comfortable delusion than to shred the already collapsing heart right?

Boredom

is not healthy.

Especially when the reason you are bored is because there is technically other things you could be doing but don't really have to yet and don't want to.

These are the times I blast music through my headphones and just rock out.

"I Am Glad I've Found You."

We dance: onstage and offstage.
We sing: sometimes for the crowd, sometimes for ourselves.
Sometimes we forget the steps.
Sometimes we forget the words.
Sometimes we forget why we perform at all.


"We could learn a lot together
Even if we're not together.
I am glad I've found you.
The ether lay us out together
I prefer the darker weather
I want my arms around you."

Being Sick

is weird. I keep changing perspectives.

You know that feeling when you catch a smell and you're taken back to the way you felt back when?
It's like that, but all the time.
And each time things look and feel different.

Although, being delirious because you're sick is TONS of fun.

RUCIFEE!

Labs

are evil.
I get anxious and irritable just thinking about them.

Healthy

HONESTLY IT'S NOT MY FAULT!!!

I'm just... addicted to healthy food.
It doesn't mean that I can't sneak in some ice cream or dessert, because I still love those, I do. But... I like vegetables and I wish I knew how to make more vegetarian foods. And I've given up chips for chex mix.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!?!

Luckily, I don't have any drive to exercise. Still safe there.

On a side note, this is one of my recent addictive songs: