First posted on Help.com, I thought this was a rather nice writing of mine, so I decided to repost it here.
Seven minutes after midnight I close my laptop, and thunder sounds. In an instant my brain realizes how much wasted time has been spent. Now that the video games, TV, and computer are turned off, and my imagination is in control, I’m back in real life. Sensation seems so new. The infinite world of drama, possibilities, mistakes, pleasures, pictures, words, and information unknown are swept away by my immediate surroundings. This can’t be healthy. It’s almost like drugs or alcohol: mindless entertainment meant to be forgotten. What was that funny saying? How does that cute kitten do anything for me? I’m glad I completed that level, even though i’m restarting the game next week anyways.
I’m sad to reflect and find that this shadow of life has become my life. My existence is spent avoiding itself entirely. In this moment of clarity I find myself wishing to be alone in this. Unfortunately, I do believe my hope is in vain. I fear that many, if not most, are trapped in illusion of one form or another. As we let fantasy become more important than reality, our reality dulls and fades. Each forced step back into real life becomes less and less pleasant as the real world falls apart. I don’t want to live this way. I don’t want to wake up in reality one day and wonder how it became so lifeless. This is a cry for help. This is a call to action. This is a question waiting to be answered. Why is everything so surreal?
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Indeed I worry.
How cliche. I'm going to complain about the government.
I am worried for the United States. Our democracy has not become what it once was.
Government as a whole is hard. It is a wonderful idea: the ability to have a group of people working together for and with each other, with a government as the head. The issue with this is that the head must be intelligent, caring, dedicated, charismatic, strong, and balanced. Almost perfect. Unfortunately, people just aren't that good. Multiple types have been created in an attempt to find the best kind of government using the flawed people it consists of.
Monarchy hopes that the single ruler will be good enough, even with his/her flaws, to lead a stable people. With certain monarchs, this has worked. Countries have prospered under the control of an individual who is fit to rule. Unfortunately, it is not always this way. This method can make governments that utterly destroy the country, and transfer of power is not always stable.
Aristocracy is a form of government that allows more than one person to help make decisions, specifically the elite. It assumes that the elite will be more fit for the position having gone through training and education, yet balanced enough among the small group. Unfortunately, the elite upbringing does not always instill kindness for the less fortunate. A good idea, but too unstable.
Democracy is meant to use the entire population. Statistically, everyone should balance until a perfect medium is created, which would be suitable for government.
The Democracy/Republic combination the United States uses is indeed a very good idea. It allows for rapid decision making, yet allows for the voice of the people to base the choices.
Unfortunately, a kink has formed. Our people have become soft. They do not research. They do not question. Our government has become a tug of war of the loud ones. Groups can plead for anything, as long as they keep it "politically correct." The winners are the ones who can create the most believable propaganda, and get it to the majority. Our people eat it up. Rumors and gossip are some of our best judgement. Truth no longer matters. Our government is always in a constant swing of conservatism vs. liberalism, but I fear that we are ripe to fall into radicalism. Should radicals of either side become loud and favored enough to take control, our country will fall.
As of now, I worry that radical liberals are taking this chance. Playing on the heart of the people, they have convinced them that a minority, any minority, should be given extra power because they are not as represented. We are a democracy. As a democracy, the goal is to even out power. Giving one person more than another because of their condition, birth, or preference goes against what we stand for. Liberals hail "equality" but they instead fight against it.
What our country has need of now is silence. If no one is yelling, arguing, blaming, or attacking others, we might be able to find that we all, as America, are equal. Forget the past, forgive things others have done wrong, and work together to move forward.
It breaks my heart to see such a good idea become so tainted.
I am worried for the United States. Our democracy has not become what it once was.
Government as a whole is hard. It is a wonderful idea: the ability to have a group of people working together for and with each other, with a government as the head. The issue with this is that the head must be intelligent, caring, dedicated, charismatic, strong, and balanced. Almost perfect. Unfortunately, people just aren't that good. Multiple types have been created in an attempt to find the best kind of government using the flawed people it consists of.
Monarchy hopes that the single ruler will be good enough, even with his/her flaws, to lead a stable people. With certain monarchs, this has worked. Countries have prospered under the control of an individual who is fit to rule. Unfortunately, it is not always this way. This method can make governments that utterly destroy the country, and transfer of power is not always stable.
Aristocracy is a form of government that allows more than one person to help make decisions, specifically the elite. It assumes that the elite will be more fit for the position having gone through training and education, yet balanced enough among the small group. Unfortunately, the elite upbringing does not always instill kindness for the less fortunate. A good idea, but too unstable.
Democracy is meant to use the entire population. Statistically, everyone should balance until a perfect medium is created, which would be suitable for government.
The Democracy/Republic combination the United States uses is indeed a very good idea. It allows for rapid decision making, yet allows for the voice of the people to base the choices.
Unfortunately, a kink has formed. Our people have become soft. They do not research. They do not question. Our government has become a tug of war of the loud ones. Groups can plead for anything, as long as they keep it "politically correct." The winners are the ones who can create the most believable propaganda, and get it to the majority. Our people eat it up. Rumors and gossip are some of our best judgement. Truth no longer matters. Our government is always in a constant swing of conservatism vs. liberalism, but I fear that we are ripe to fall into radicalism. Should radicals of either side become loud and favored enough to take control, our country will fall.
As of now, I worry that radical liberals are taking this chance. Playing on the heart of the people, they have convinced them that a minority, any minority, should be given extra power because they are not as represented. We are a democracy. As a democracy, the goal is to even out power. Giving one person more than another because of their condition, birth, or preference goes against what we stand for. Liberals hail "equality" but they instead fight against it.
What our country has need of now is silence. If no one is yelling, arguing, blaming, or attacking others, we might be able to find that we all, as America, are equal. Forget the past, forgive things others have done wrong, and work together to move forward.
It breaks my heart to see such a good idea become so tainted.
Monday, August 2, 2010
It's beautiful when Nature and I connect.
I was in pain, so I ran.
I put my headphones in my ears and made a playlist of my favorite songs so I wouldn't have to change them.
I walked down the road to the small entryway to the forest behind our subdivision. I slipped in alone and bolted through the path.
"It must have been awhile since someone has been here" I thought as I brushed away another spiderweb that I had run into.
The path shrank and became uneven. The dirt became less packed and more muddy. I was growing tired and my footing was unsure so I slowed to a walk.
The path became a dried up stream with small banks on either side. Sometimes I walked through the middle, and sometimes I used the banks.
The dried stream became a flowing one and I was forced to abandon my course for a slightly trod path through the trees.
This path ended up crossing the now full stream, and I had no intention of wading through, so I jumped. Hooray for being young and springy.
The path on the other side became less and less obvious as I continued, eventually becoming so closed in I had to duck through.
Strangely, the path cleared and opened up immediately after. Seeing a clearing not far away, I started running again and soon emerged into a field. Right near me was what looked like something wooden surrounded by thick plants and thorns. I walked around this odd clump and found a relatively easy entrance. The wooden structure was revealed to be a destroyed house, with wood rotting and the metal roof rusting beneath my feet.
I exited the enclosure and got a better look at the field I had walked into.
It guessed it to be mostly tobacco, but I wasn't sure. I saw a hill not far away so I walked through the unplanted parts to reach the top.
I was amazed at the butterflies and birds that flew over my head, not seeming to mind my presence. I disturbed some insects in the low foliage at my feet with each step, but they simply hopped or flew to another area nearby.
I reached the summit and looked back. It was gorgeous. The day was overcast, showing a light grey sky with a few different shades here and there.
The landscape was hilly, covered in squares of crops with green lines between them. Scattered throughout were strange clumps of trees and vines that stuck out because of their size, and seemed to serve no purpose but fit the scene perfectly. Surrounding the garden was a dense and full forest, covered in green but with some brown, yellow, and red poking out.
"This," I thought, "Is an amazing sight. Better than many tourist spots."
I knew I was on property that was not my own, so I looked for just a little longer before heading back to the forest. I had not been in the forest long before a dragonfly flew by too quickly to see clearly. It landed on a leaf near me and watched me. I paused to look at it, and it seemed to look at me too. We remained this way for ten seconds or so, and the dragonfly decided he had other things to do. I realized I did to, and continued my journey home.
I put my headphones in my ears and made a playlist of my favorite songs so I wouldn't have to change them.
I walked down the road to the small entryway to the forest behind our subdivision. I slipped in alone and bolted through the path.
"It must have been awhile since someone has been here" I thought as I brushed away another spiderweb that I had run into.
The path shrank and became uneven. The dirt became less packed and more muddy. I was growing tired and my footing was unsure so I slowed to a walk.
The path became a dried up stream with small banks on either side. Sometimes I walked through the middle, and sometimes I used the banks.
The dried stream became a flowing one and I was forced to abandon my course for a slightly trod path through the trees.
This path ended up crossing the now full stream, and I had no intention of wading through, so I jumped. Hooray for being young and springy.
The path on the other side became less and less obvious as I continued, eventually becoming so closed in I had to duck through.
Strangely, the path cleared and opened up immediately after. Seeing a clearing not far away, I started running again and soon emerged into a field. Right near me was what looked like something wooden surrounded by thick plants and thorns. I walked around this odd clump and found a relatively easy entrance. The wooden structure was revealed to be a destroyed house, with wood rotting and the metal roof rusting beneath my feet.
I exited the enclosure and got a better look at the field I had walked into.
It guessed it to be mostly tobacco, but I wasn't sure. I saw a hill not far away so I walked through the unplanted parts to reach the top.
I was amazed at the butterflies and birds that flew over my head, not seeming to mind my presence. I disturbed some insects in the low foliage at my feet with each step, but they simply hopped or flew to another area nearby.
I reached the summit and looked back. It was gorgeous. The day was overcast, showing a light grey sky with a few different shades here and there.
The landscape was hilly, covered in squares of crops with green lines between them. Scattered throughout were strange clumps of trees and vines that stuck out because of their size, and seemed to serve no purpose but fit the scene perfectly. Surrounding the garden was a dense and full forest, covered in green but with some brown, yellow, and red poking out.
"This," I thought, "Is an amazing sight. Better than many tourist spots."
I knew I was on property that was not my own, so I looked for just a little longer before heading back to the forest. I had not been in the forest long before a dragonfly flew by too quickly to see clearly. It landed on a leaf near me and watched me. I paused to look at it, and it seemed to look at me too. We remained this way for ten seconds or so, and the dragonfly decided he had other things to do. I realized I did to, and continued my journey home.
Hidden in Shadow.
I hate lies.
Being mean is terrible. Being arrogant ticks me off. But lies are the worst.
Lying is cheating. When looking at a situation that will be incredibly hard to face, lying puts it away under a thin cover.
As time goes on, the unconfronted issue expands, and the cover must be extended.
Eventually, the problem becomes too large and too complex to hide, and it tears off the sheet and starts destroying things.
At this point, the original liar wishes they had simply told the truth from the start.
Unfortunately, our society has bred lying into our relationships.
We are supposed to impress others with our fake accomplishments.
We are supposed to sugarcoat the things others do wrong.
We are supposed to lead on people who don't feel the way we do, because it's the "nicest" thing to do.
We are supposed to please both parties who want us to join them.
It's absolutely maddening. How can you trust anyone when you're expecting them to lie to you?
As cute as it may be, it's heartbreaking to hear the banter of teenagers who obviously like each other but are both tripping over words to hide it.
Honesty, I realize, could tear the world to pieces. But from the pieces, the puzzle would be put back together. Correctly. Wouldn't it be nice if you KNEW who liked you and who didn't? If businesses couldn't trick you? If the agony of not knowing was completely erased?
That is my wish. If only it could be realized.
Being mean is terrible. Being arrogant ticks me off. But lies are the worst.
Lying is cheating. When looking at a situation that will be incredibly hard to face, lying puts it away under a thin cover.
As time goes on, the unconfronted issue expands, and the cover must be extended.
Eventually, the problem becomes too large and too complex to hide, and it tears off the sheet and starts destroying things.
At this point, the original liar wishes they had simply told the truth from the start.
Unfortunately, our society has bred lying into our relationships.
We are supposed to impress others with our fake accomplishments.
We are supposed to sugarcoat the things others do wrong.
We are supposed to lead on people who don't feel the way we do, because it's the "nicest" thing to do.
We are supposed to please both parties who want us to join them.
It's absolutely maddening. How can you trust anyone when you're expecting them to lie to you?
As cute as it may be, it's heartbreaking to hear the banter of teenagers who obviously like each other but are both tripping over words to hide it.
Honesty, I realize, could tear the world to pieces. But from the pieces, the puzzle would be put back together. Correctly. Wouldn't it be nice if you KNEW who liked you and who didn't? If businesses couldn't trick you? If the agony of not knowing was completely erased?
That is my wish. If only it could be realized.
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